Trunk Monkeyed

It started innocently enough but the Trunk Monkey spanked me hard. A long hot shower and 22oz of Hop in the Dark, to help wash down the Advil I gobbled earlier, I think I’m beginning to feel better, that or the alcohol is beginning to kick in.

The first ride in a number of years on the full UrbanWarfare link-up plus a new bonus section was the order of the day. Together with Sonny, Steve and Wade we departed Cypress Falls Park for the ascent up the BLT; originally an acronym for Boulders, Logs and Trees, a new development planned in the area and associated infrastructure upgrades should have the trail re-badged: Bulldozers, Logging and Turn-Offs.

Cypress isn’t normally an “XC” friendly place to ride however should there be any climbing encountered on the many trails the rider pressure drops by significant amounts. So it is with Urban Warfare, just a little too much effort required to get to the good stuff and swaths of untouched steep techy XC trails are to be found. In one case just over a bike length from a prominent shuttle downhill trail that after 10+ years still remains untouched.

It was after a trip to Baghdad that my journey went seriously awry. Trunk Monkey, a new DH oriented trail is found on the climbing traverse that leads back to more of the aforementioned goodness. Still in tourist mode we elected to drop in. Steep rock rolls, A little bit of ladder work and one very unexpected crash later I found myself closer to the trail than planned and somewhat short of breath. Having been expelled from my bike with little to no time to get my hands out, my chest landed square on my upper as I in turn had just impacted terra firma.

Hindsight sucks… Should have carried on with the objective of the complete Urban Warfare that we now had added “Hooters”(named for the mating pair of Owls we saw while on the trail), another old line that helped bypass a few hundred meters of double track that eventually led us to the aforementioned Trunk Monkey and my subsequent beat-down.

As much as I tried it was difficult to continue on the bike, the terrain was the least of the worries as so much energy was spent tensing and guarding my chest I found it difficult to pedal. So much so that I couldn’t complete the last 2 km of climbing to return to my car, as my chest couldn’t inflate without significant discomfort. I can’t remember the last time I abandoned a ride due to injury, fortunately we were 10 minutes from completion.

A big painful plate of irony

A few hours after having begun this post I now sit marginally more comfortably a few more beers in and having feasted on ribs that had been in the slow cooker all day. The irony of that meal now is too much to ignore…